Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Dallas, Here I Come!

This weekend, I'll be attending the infamous day-long blogging conference, Bloggy Boot Camp, in Dallas. While I'm excited to have it take place in a nearby city, Dallas is still a good 3-3.5 hours away, meaning that I'll be staying overnight both nights.

I'd be lying to say I wasn't looking forward to going. The thought of adult company, meeting and connecting with people I only know online, making new friends and having the chance to learn things that will not only better my blog, but my writing and freelance work as well, all sounds like a blast. But...

It'll be my first ever time away from Ava. Ever. 

I mean, sure, I've spent a few hours here and there away from her, but the longest stretch ever was during my bachelorette party - and I was gone from about 11am until after dinner, when my lame self trekked it back home because I apparently can't do both day and night drinking these days. Anyhow, I've never been away from her overnight. And I'm a little bit freaking out about it.

It's not that I don't trust my husband. In fact, he's definitely the more cautious of the two of us, since I've adopted a laidback attitude about parenting that's come from years of working with children on a daily basis. I just feel so scared and worried and anxious that something bad could happen, especially with him driving three hours each way to his parents with her (!!!), and that I'll never see her again.

Ridiculous, I know. So was the fact that I used to stay awake night after night monitoring her breathing, when it comes down to it. But I'm afraid of little as a parent except losing my child, and that fear is taking over right now.

I really kicked around canceling my trip to stay at home. But then I thought more and more about it, and that's ridiculous. I didn't go to the first conveniently located bloggy boot camp two years ago because I didn't want to leave Ava - and it was in Austin! I just would've been gone for one day. And now, of course, I'm wishing I would have gone then, so I'd have some modicum of comfort with the situation now. So I'm pushing out of my comfort zone, trusting in my husband and having faith that all will be ok (knock on wood!!!), and biting the bullet: I'm packing up my car, picking up some other local bloggers (shout out to Leigh Ann and Melissa - woot!), and heading to Bloggy Boot Camp for the weekend! Dallas, here I come!

Any advice for a mama leaving her baby 2.5 year old for the first time? Are these feelings normal? Am I insane (a question likely better left unanswered)?!?

(Also, I feel like I should clarify since this makes me sound like an insane, hovering, anxiety-ridden mama, which I am generally not. In fact, I'm usually quite the opposite, sitting back and letting Ava do her own thing and following her lead. Just so you first-timers reading this don't think I'm, well, crazier than I really am. Which is still pretty crazy.)


  1. So this is the first time my husband and 9.5 month old will be alone for this long. Not sure who will be left standing. I'm excited for the break but will be texting every 45 mins to make sure everyone is ok. I am thinking about not going to the reception on Friday because that means two Mom-free bedtimes in a row. Emotions would be high. Not sayin' whose.

    Good for you for not canceling. Looking forward to meeting you! (maybe Friday, maybe not.)

  2. This is totally normal. We all feel the same way. I'll be face timing my family more than they want. See you there.

  3. It sounds like an awesome opportunity and it's great you're able to go. It's completely normal for you to feel some anxiety over leaving her for the first time. I have yet to leave Jack overnight (in fact, I'm still the only one who has ever out him to bed!) and when the time does come I know I'll be the same way. I left him for about 8 hours a couple Saturdays ago to attend a wedding. He stayed with my dad and I knew he was in good hands, but it was the longest they'd ever spent together and I thought about them the whole day (in between my mimosas ;)). I'm glad you're not cancelling and I hope you are able to enjoy your time away!


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