Is my baby huge???
OK, so here's the back story...
I took Ava to her first birthday party this past Saturday. I was a bit nervous to go, since I knew only two people there - one of which was the birthday boy's mommy, obviously - and so I didn't know how it would go. What I continuously forget when I find myself nervous about these types of situations is that if you're a mom, hanging out with other moms, you instantly have about 1829127 things in common. You have a kid, presumably close in age, and voila! Instant conversation starter. Anyhow, I easily fell into conversation with a couple of nice mommies who complimented Ava on her party dress and being such a cutie patootie. Aww, shucks. All was going fine and dandy, until they up and went here:
"Wait, how old is she? Wow, she's huge!" said one mom.
"Seriously, I would've thought she was 9 or 10 months old at least!" added the other.
Well, boo to you too.
I do not mean to portray a picture of me as one of those moms you'd see on Toddlers & Tiaras, critical of their child's looks or weight or any of that. Ava can be a chunker or a baldy or any manner of descriptive words, and I will still think she's the absolute most gorgeous baby that ever walked the face of the Earth (is she not?). The thing that really worries me is just that I'm either a.) doing something wrong (overfeeding her??? Is that possible on a steady diet of breastmilk and homemade, organic fruits and vegetables? I think not...), or b.) that she's a chubster and that if that's her route in life, that she'll be made fun of by other children. I was teased horribly in school (not for being overweight, but really, kids can find anything, can't they??), and I'm totally screwed up from it even 15 years later (hence the anxiety about meeting new people at the birthday party).
I really don't think she's that big. I mean, yeah, she's tall. She's probably taller than a lot of kiddos her age (hence the upwards of 90% on height usually). And yeah, homegirls got a little chub on her thighs, but babies are supposed to have chubs. It's adorable. And it serves the purpose of providing padding when they inevitably tumble over. Over and over and over. But there was a 15-month-old (albeit petite) that was the same size!!!! No joke.
I can't imagine she's just predisposed to being a bigger than average kiddo, seeing as how D and I are both pretty small people. I'm the tallest woman in my family, and I'm 5'5".
Part of it may be her legs. While she can still sport most of her 3-6 month onesies, her long legs need a nearly 12 month pant in order to keep her from sporting highwaters.
Now that I've written this post, I realize how silly I'm being. Maybe A's big. Maybe that little girl at the party was tiny. Maybe she's going to be a beautiful amazon with long legs, and will make a fortune modeling. Maybe sometimes other parents are dumb and say things that might be hurtful without thinking.
Whatever. She's perfect to me.
That last sentence of your post? Perfect comeback for when people are rude and imply that your child is bigger/taller/fatter than she's "supposed" to be.
ReplyDeleteAnne is at the 50 percentile for height and weight, and I constantly hear that she's both "so big for her age," and "so tiny for her age." Whatever.
People are weird.
Psh, don't EVEN listen to them. Ava's a doll! Your doctor hasn't said anything, so I wouldn't worry a bit. People tell me Bryson's a giant for his age, (which, he realy is pretty tall) but I've just made it a point for everything to go in one ear and out the other and not sit and harp on it...which is much easier said than done!
ReplyDeleteBut really, they're probably just jealous of her adorable-ness :)
Here's what I've found. Everyone has an opinion and they like to share them often; only to leave us worrying (obsessing?) over it. I am dealing with the same situation except everyone is telling me how small Presley is. I have had people ask me if she was born premature, or they are completely shocked when they find out how old she is. Geez, people!! So, now, I feel like I'm doing something wrong? Anyway, I totally get it. Ava is perfect!!! Your doing a great job, Momma.
ReplyDeleteAva's perfect just the way she is!! My daughter is at 85% for weight and 90% for height and she's beautiful too... chubby rolls and all. Don't borrow worry!! You'll have plenty to worry about in the next 18 years. Unless the doctor says otherwise, keep on doing what you're doing. :-)
ReplyDeleteI agree with everyone. People are dumb! Jack is in the 95th percentile for weight and 97th for height (or vice versa, but either way he is super big). I can't take him out without someone, somewhere commenting on how big he is. It does annoy me but I get over it quickly. It helps that we also get a lot of, "what a gorgeous baby" or "such a cute baby". But even without those comments, he is perfect to me. Actually, I don't see him as being all that big. To me, his size is normal. I don't have any other babies so he is what I am used to. In fact, if I were to have another baby who ended up being tiny, I wouldn't know what to do. I like having a big baby and it's what I know. It's only when I compare him to other kids that I realize just how big he is. Jack is 22 pounds and my friend's almost 2 year old is 23 pounds. WTF?! BUT he was born 5 weeks early and Jack was right on time. You'll drive yourself crazy if you compare Ava to other babies, whether it be physically or developmentally. I also think that breastfed babies tend to be chunkier than formula fed babies. I don't know! Who cares! Ava is a doll and she is perfect!
ReplyDeleteYes, everyone has an opinion and most are not shy about sharing it. This is one of the reasons we didn't tell names when we pretty much knew what it was... because we didn't want to have to listen to everyone's opinions on it!!! I haven't had anyone say that Bennett is "huge" but I keep hearing people call him a "chunk". And you know what? He's not a "chunk". I've seen multiple babies that are much "chunkier" than he is. "Is he off the charts?" No... he's not. I just wish sometimes that people would learn to keep their mouths shut once in a while and think before they speak. A lot of people don't... and I guess we just have to take that into consideration and worry less about what everyone else thinks and more about how much we love these precious little people. Ava is absolutely beautiful!!!!! Don't ever think twice about that.. and forget people and their big mouths. :)
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